COLDPLAY

So I figured if I put up a few Jo'Bro's up then I better freakin' put up some Coldplay and Snow Patrol pics! This concert was jacked! Definitly one of my top favs for sure! It was moving and packed with energy, that crazy kid Chris Martin never stops running around...ok well he does because he plays piano but his butt is rarely on the piano bench! Snow Patrol were awesome, it was so evident that they were all physced to be there! I would see them for a third time fo sho!

huh aparantly I really didn't take many pics, and non with my camera of SP..just on my phone. I find they never turn out really and then I waste time taking pictures and not enjoying the show.

The Jo Bro's.

Yep there they are. Nick on the keys, Kevin on lead guitar and Joe in the white T. This concert was suprisingly good! I had a blast mocking the shrieking/tearful adolesence but I also had a blast jumping and yelling to the songs. They put on a great show...although with a budget that size who wouldn't!

I saw Public Enemy Tonight. Save yourself $10 and 3 hours, don't go.

MERLIN

I've discovered another tv show... Merlin, origianlly aired last year in England, and aired in North America last Sunday. It's sort of cheesy at times and may not have the best special effects but Phhh I don't care I like it! It's a twist on the old tails of Merlin, King Arthur and Camelot, they're just entering into adulthood and discovering who they are. Anyways, yep, I'm a nerd and I'm a fan!!

Did you know that JK Rowling is a part of the Church of Scotland.

Anyways.... yep.

Thanks Alley.

Here is a song that I've found very encouraging the past little while...

Lyrics to Wait And See :
I was born in Tennessee
Late July humidity
Doctor said I was lucky to be alive

I’ve been trouble since the day that I got here
Trouble till the day that I disappear
That’ll be the day that I finally get it right

There is hope for me yet
Because God won’t forget
All the plans he’s made for me
I have to wait and see
He’s not finished with me yet

I never really was that good in school
I talked too much, broke the rules
Teacher thought I was hopeless fool alright

I don’t know how but I made it through
It’s one of those things that you’ve gotta do
But I always had a knack for telling the truth

Chorus

Still wondering why I’m here
Still wrestling with my fear
But oh, He’s up to something
And the farther on I go
I’ve seen enough to know
That I’m, not here for nothing
He’s up to something

So now’s my time to be a man
Follow my heart as far as I can
No telling where I’m ending up tonight
I never slow down or so it seems
But singing my heart it’s one of my dreams
All I gotta do is hold on tight

Commitment. Wow, this commitment thing with this blog is tricky. Here's a couple of thoughts. I have missed a bunch. Some may say I've failed my commitment...but really who was this commitment for!? ME! It was to help me stay on course, serve as a reminder that I should blog more. Share more. Write more. However it has become a "religious" thing, something I dont enjoy but think "DANG I didnt' write a blog today" Like so many things, the joy of blogging or the desire to blog has been replaced by pure "gotta plug in something." Sometimes commitment is a good thing, and it causes you to do something even if you dont want to. Like marriage, when married I suspect you will not always want to be married, I know you will not always "love" your spouse or desire to be with them, however you have made a commitment, nah a covenant relationship. OR lets say a commitment in a job, we all know there are days when you do not want it, you dont love it, your not passionate, however you've made a commtiment to be there and that is what keeps you there, and sees you through to the joy in that position. However I am talking about a blog, A BLOG. SO what am I getting at. . . I dont know, maybe I will remain and write twice a week. Maybe I won't. Maybe I'll write on Thursdays, or Fridays...both or not at all!.

Yay for rants, that was fun.

I THOUGHT I POSTED THIS.

Well folks, I failed my commitment, again. Not only did I miss wednesdays but I missed yesterdays as well...but I honestly thought I posted IT!!!! SO it was done... anyways here it is.

Today of course is Fathers day...but for my bro-in-law it was not only his first fathers day, his sons dedication but also his birthday *which I freakin' forgot!* Crazy hey. I hope he still felt special, I would be a tad selfish and think...hey it's MY BIRTHDAY....

Anyways. Yep, today I had the honour of dedicating little man Gabriel, he was so cute, and he didn't cry and my parents were there. Yeah it was special.

Yesterday I went to Coldplay HOKIE FREAKIN' DINAH! It was a ridiculous show...if you've been you know what I mean, if you haven't freakin' GO. Chris Martin is a freakin' machine, randomly yells "yeeeaaaappp" and is incredibly talented. Well done CP well done. Snowpatrol...they were so ridiculously happy! seriously, ok well maybe they were a little "gone" but they were so smiley and totally enjoying themselves.

Could you imagine if the "that was easy" button really worked. wow. what would you use it on..if you could only use it once?!

Terminator Salvation

I saw the 10:30pm showing of T4 tonight, and well... loved it *sing songy voice*! I was super skeptical actually because my bro in law didn't seem too amped about it. Phhhh it was so rad, and Christian Bale did fabulous...could he not?! It was funny to me though because I went with two other pastors from CHC...total night owls I tell ya! We had just sat through a 3.5 hour congregational meeting...funny thing, you don't have to pass notes anymore on paper, just blackberry messanger. Man sometimes I love technology. Yay for random.

I saw all my siblings today. And all my nieces and nephews *some for a very brief moment*
Anyways my mom, Riley (13) Isaac (11) and Ella (7) walked down the street for ice-cream and sat infront of the community hall in the sun. We were playing 20 questions and it was Ellas turn...priceless. She confused us a few times by saying it had one leg, then it didnt' have a leg, and then it was an animal and it lived in the sea, but it wasnt' a whale because it only had one fin...and...it was just really cute because we were all confused and Riley stated a few times "I'm lost" and then Ella exclaimed "IT'S A MERMAID!" Briliant really.

I love my family I really do.

Night.

Numbers, money, budget.... ICK! I've never been one to really freak out over money, but I tell ya when faced with having to finalize the budget for youth, FREAK OUT! haha. I just loathed it, it caused me to cringe, cry and carry on like a small child. Ok really I only cringed a lot, but it totally robbed my joy for a few hours today, until people started visiting me in my office. Yeah, I like people, and I hate numbers.

On a side note I get to dedicate my nephew Gabriel on fathers day! How freakin' rad is that?! Man now there are some definate joys about being a Pastor.

To re-cap today's lesson. People Good. Numbers Bad.

Excuses Excuses!

I know that it's been two weeks since my last post, I do apologize but I've been in Hawaii. I left early Wednesday the 27 and got home this past Friday.

I left thinking that this trip would be a "vacation" however God had other, better, plans for me and MY trip. You see he's been teaching me how possessive I am of things...I think I've written on here about that. Well this trip was the next lesson! The night I arrived, I discovered that I would have to be involved daily in all ministry activities *oh yeah I was staying with my dear friend Janelle at hte ministry she works for called Surfing the nations. check them out!!* And God had to quickly change my attitude and turn in into a servant one. I'm so thankful he did. Such a rad time of rejuvenation and service. We had daily quiet times and there was a couple amazing times of worship and prayer for various things and people. I really felt God use and teach me in Hawaii and I feel so blessed to be a part of the Ohana of Surfing the Nations. I had an awesome time, and of course I got to enjoy being a tourist as well.

Here are some things that 100% made me smile:

- Seeing Janelle *it's been 9 months* and seeing how the Lord is moulding her and using her!
- Sleeping on the beach with the stars as my night light
- Hanging out with Baby Nemos and Sea Turtles!
- Coconut and Chocolate covered Macdamia nuts
- Meeting a great random group of people
- Surfing in Waikiki
- Longboarding in Waikiki
- Making WAY too many Lost references
- Swedish boys with stutters
- Sunsets and Swimming
- Bus adventures
- Praying with friends
- Giving out food to 400 people
- Chatting with "Woody" a dude who lives in his mini-bus turned bedroom
- Countless gorgeous views
- Being in the presence of the Lord

... I dont have all my pics, because they got erased of my disk, so I have to wait for Jan to send them. But here are a few...

Days like today...

...make me love being a Youth Pastor.

Today was beautiful. I had the honour of baptizing four of my youth girls. It was rad to hear their hearts, pray with them, and dunk them. Such a beautiful image.

We did it on a lake, the sun was shinning, the church family was gathered and the Lord was ever present.

Afterwords many loitered about and I got a crew to jump off the dock.

It was refreshing. Such a blessing.

Also, summer is upon us... HOLLA!

Frick.

WOW. I'm doing awesome at this commitment thing now hey!? Phh not so much. While reading a facebook note I was inspired to do a random list post...

Hint of lime Tostitos are ridiculously good, and have more than a hint of lime to them.

I waited at a traffic light for like 15 minutes before rerouteing and turning left.

I'm becoming more and more awkward with age.

I drove to PoCo, Langley, and Surrey today. I've put over 1000 km on my three week car.

Some children are really just rude.

When people love what they are doing, it shows, even if they love it at that moment.

The guy at Starbucks supplied me with my own label, so now I no longer have to stumble my through the order just to receive my drink. Thank you!

I am attending 5 weddings this summer, starting this Saturday. I was at their rehearsal today and they are so ridiculously in love, not just the mushy kind but the yeah this is for life kind.

I've heard a relationship with God being labeled as the first love. I need to cultivate my first love to once more be my first love, I miss him.

It's such an incredible honour to be working with those that I work with, I'm blessed to be able to say that.

...5 days.

It feels like Sunday.

Ok so, the post after my apology post and I miss it ...SHAME.

Hmm. I feel as though I should post something extra juicy to cover that up...

It's amazing how much plants and fake greenery can change a place. My current roomate will no longer be my roommate come June 1st and she has slowly begun moving out. Today the bamboo on the side table is gone, and the face tree thing from the bathroom counter is gone. Sad really.

I'll have to make a trip to Ikea.

I need more things for my walls too...very bare, very bare indeed.

COMMITMENT OVERLOAD!

Dear Friends,

I'm sorry for those who regularly visit this blog and know that I have made a commitment to blog twice a week, Sunday and Wednesdays. I am sorry because you will be aware that I have missed not only Wednesday but the Sunday post as well.

There are no excuses for this. It's really that I got too busy, forgot or was too lazy when I remembered.

On the flip side, I feel that the past couple of weeks I've signed onto a number of heavy commitments: A permanent job, car payments and a phone contract. If you know me well you know that I enjoy being a "roamer" a bit of a free spirit if you will. Up to this point the only real "commitment" was with a two year phone contract that I could easily buy my way out of.

I've come to the conclusion that commitment scares me, and it seems to squish me...

...mold me into an adult, who to be honest I'm not sure I want to be.

So with that being said please accept my apology for bailing out not once but twice in a row on this commitment.

Yours Truly,

Megan

Yes those are keys in my hand.

I made the plunge.

I'm significantly in debt.

But I ride with confidence and style.

Cheers to settling and growing up.

DANG! I buy faster than I read.

I added the following books to my collection, all for just over $30.

Yes I am aware of the fact that 3/4 of them are Childrens books.

I got those book in less then 10 min. at a fab used book store!

On the same day I had a picnice and flew kites by the ocean and climbed a small mountain. I wish everyday was an adventure such as that.

About time

I got this album!

After hearing a few songs this past weekend, I began searching for Metrics new Albume "Fantasies". You know when you want something, and the more you can't have it the more you want it?! Yep that was what this was. Sunday I looked for it at the future shop and the HMV in Abbotsford. After the second attempt failed I couldnt' leave empty handed so I bought Ok Go's Oh no album. *good purchase but not what I wanted!* Then monday on the way to Walnut Grove to watch 17 Again *loved it!* I stopped in at the Best Buy in langley...no such luck, but I had no time to go to the mall or anywhere else. So once again I was disapointed.
TODAY I was still determined to get the album so I phoned HMV....it was in! So I went and I am currently listening to it... so far so worth it.

Today I listened to three of my friends express how they are frustrated, confused or incredible hurt by a guy(s). Then I heard another say that they are not focusing on a "relationship" until after the summer.

My heart actually aches for one of them. I'm sorry they are feeling broken.

Full day.

Lost = awesomeness

Sun = blessing!

Job = exciting

Single = thankfulness

Music = glory

The End.

Inspiration..

This will forever be one of my favorite songs.

Dandelions

By Five Iron Frenzy

In a field of yellow flowers,

underneath the sun,

bluest eyes that spark with lightning,

boy with shoes undone.

He is young, so full of hope,

reveling in tiny dreams,

filling up, his arms with flowers,

right for giving any queen.

Running to her beaming bright,

while cradling his prize.

A flickering of yellow light,

within his mother's eyes.

She holds them to her heart,

keeping them where they'll be safe,

clasped within her very marrow,

dandelions in a vase.

She sees love where,

anyone else would see weeds.

all hope is found.

Here is everything he needs.

Fathomless your endless mercy,weight I could not lift.

Where do I fit in this puzzle,what good are these gifts?

Not a martyr, or a saint, scarcely can I struggle through.

All that I have ever wanted,was to give my best to you.

Lord, search my heart,create in me something clean.

Dandelions you see flowers in these weeds.

Gently lifting hands to heaven,

softened by the sweetest hush,

a Father sings over his children,

loving them so very much.

More than words could warrant,

deeper than the darkest blue,

more than sacrifice could merit,

Lord, I give my heart to you.

SHUT UP!

That was the reply I gave Colin Ashton *the sr.high youth pastor* when he said the elders wanted to know if I'd be the perminent middle school pastor at Central Heights Church.

I quickly recovered with a resonding YES!!

I got the call half an hour after I left the Elder interview.

So there you have it. It's official I can now take the "Interim" off my title.
Weird... I'm a perminent, pastor.

Praise God! I have confidence in where I am at because of how the Lord has lead me here. It's been a long journey, but it's amazing to know that you are walking in the path that the Lord has set out for you!

So the adventure continues!!

SHINE....

...make them wonder what you got, make them wish that they were not, on the outside looking in!!

No I'm not going to write about the Newsboys song, however I am going to post a little something about my weekend on the retreat I took 21 of my middle schoolers on. . .

SO here they are, aren't they lovely?! Almost normal looking right?! Yeah, that facade doesn't last long for any of us....

It really was a great weekend. To be honest I was freakin' out a tad about it. I was nervous as it was my fist leading a group of youth on something out in the "world" for that amout of time, traveling, and with other groups, and and and yeah just a lot going through my mind. And the first time I was wondered how I was going to make it to Sunday and well I did make it and rad things happened! I love these crazy youth I really do... even after being sleep deprived ... God is Good.

..so tired, brain ceasing to function, eyes stinging... bed calling...

April 15 !?!?!

DANG YO! This year has been soo crazy ridiculous, I can't believe it's alreayd mid-april!! This time last year I was gearing up to graduate from college, and be starting to work at camp! That was a year ago already!??!?!?!?! I'm seriously floored. What a roller coaster of a year man! HUGE lessons and learning curves...

I think I've added learning German to my list of "To Do's"

...that was a LAME post haha.

Sunday's post. Well it feels like Sunday!

EGOCENTRIC

e-go-cen-tric [ee-goh-sen-trik, eg-oh-]

–adjective
1.
having or regarding the self or the individual as the center of all things: an egocentric philosophy that ignores social causes.
2.
having little or no regard for interests, beliefs, or attitudes other than one's own; self-centered: an egocentric person; egocentric demands upon the time and patience of others.
–noun
3.
an egocentric person.


This culture. our culture. is very aware of issues in the world. it's one that is set apart for a desire to reach beyond our own front door. to help others. social justice is something that is being more than talked about but acted out. we want causes worth dying for. we want to do more. be more. not just have more. it's a beautiful thing. yet. we are so. ego.centric. many may argue. and sure most often i would to. but i'm just rambling. but we are. atleast i am. sure i love others. spend time with others. often put aside my own "things" to care for others. but at the core of it. it comes down to me. when i'm not cared for. it's about me.


oops rant got interupted so it's over.

this post makes me seem horrible. I am not I.I . I ..I .. I am only expressing something. It started out thinking how others were egocentric. then i thought about why i'd thought that. the answer. because they werent really listening..... to ME!

HA!

Learning once more.

"I love you more than life" this lyric echoed through my chest and mind as hillsong helped me enter into worship...yet this lyric didn't roll of the tongue as it should, didn't slide into place in my heart allowing it to resonate in my soul.

Instead it rattled around.

"I love you more than life" ...could I honestly sing that? And truly mean it. Did my life reflect it? Does my heart cry it?

It almost scared me to think that I couldn't sing that... I mean really sing that.

Then yesterday during the closing session of the youth workers conference I was at. The key note speaker echoed this quesiton. Do you love Jesus? Do you REALLY love Jesus.

I know I "love" Jesus. I always will, my heart belongs to him. But yet this question has depth.

This morning as I prayed with the other pastors, I prayed that we would discover what it means to love Jesus again, that we would kneel in his presence and learn what it meant to love him.

"There is love that came for us.
Humbled to a sinner's cross you broke my shame and sinfuless you rose again victorious. Faithfulness none can deny through the storm and through the fire there is truth that sets me free Jesus Christ who lives in me.
You are stronger you are stronger.
Sin is broken you have saved me it is written Christ is risen Jesus you are Lord of all.
No beginning and no end You're my hope and my defence you came to seek and save the lost you paid it all upon the cross.
So let your name be lifted higherBe lifted higher be lifted higher"

As we repeated the chorus I felt compeled to be on my knees, and before I knew it I was there. In his presence, on my knees...just as I prayed.

I'm learning to love once more...

I'm beginning to feel like I'm bragging..

...but I just found out that SNOWPATROL is opening for Coldplay. Oh gee SO ridiculous! I'm so ridiculously stoked. Although Not as stoked as showing you these pictures of Emmy, who is now 8 days old!!



This foot right here...is fresh! Minutes after he was born.




TA DA. I didn't hold Emmy right away because I wanted Mandy and Nate to have their time, so I took this when I came back that night, after I held him. He's ridiculsouly cute.

















Blurry but beautiful!!

My Insane Concert Roster!!!

JUNE 20TH!!

JUNE 29TH!!

JULY 16

(FLOOR!!)

AUGUST 5TH!!

It's a BOY!

GABRIEL EMMETT MINION!

I got the call 1:30am Tuesday morning. I drove Mandy and Nate to the hospital, dropped them off at the door parked and ran in. Oooh it all felt like the movies. We wheeled her into the maternity room, her breathing short stout little breathes. Anyways I'll save you all the details and end at 4:14 out comes little Emmy *I'm tryin' this nic name out...what do ya think?* It was one crazy, powerful experience! Mandy did awesome, and was so funny, polite and apologetic during labour. But still... I choose adoption haha.

I was going to put up a few pics...but I'm ridiculously tired and it doesn't want to seem to load!

But trust me, he's cute!

Past week Randoms. I've...

- asked a stranger to marry me *see last post*

- dropped my iPod onto lappy's screen and put a wee mark in it that I continuously forget is permanent and try to scrap off.

- drove to Baker again to board...hurt way less this time

- bought the movie Twilight...anyone want to buy it from me?!

- walked out of a movie *I got a free movie pass*...I love you, man = ridiculously crude

- thought to myself twice in one day that I needed a hubby ...related to someone to vent to

- bought three Cd's....

1. Mercy Me - newish one... it's alright, nothing too exciting

2. The Classic Crime - The Silver Cord - so far so good! Totally enjoying it! I think I will enjoy this album more than the last one I have of theirs. The lead singers voice and style is reminding me of the panic at the disco dudes voice.

3. Jon Foreman - "Spring & Summer" - I could listen to track five on the spring album over and over again. "Your love is strong". this song was epic while drivin' to the fort with the mountains bathed in sunlight! Seriously look it up.

- Baked a cake *from a box*

- Laughed, and really meant it, a number of times.

- practiced what I preached...literally, and it can be difficult at times.

- disappointed friends while trying to help others

- acquired another novel ..."Catch 22" ...thanks mom

- felt important, overlooked, rejected, accepted, acommplished, tired, unappriciated, confused, joyful...

- received this picture from a friend...

...they are a true friend indeed.

It's still wednesday to me!!

I'm all flustered now, I had thought of a bunch of fun, random, thought-provoking, love promoting things to write over that last few days and now...

I give you this picture...

...your asking me to have faith

...how much?

This constant pull from within is crashing against the interior of my heart. It will be silenced for now. No not silenced but hushed into a gentle colapsing wave. I will have faith. This faith will grow, expand and dwell within, consuming the empty ions that are searching for doubt. Their hope falters as my faith expounds.

SO CLOSE

So, I had this opened, yet had not begun writing before midnight.

And here is why.

I got a call at like 11:20 from my brother in-law

"Are you still awake"
"Yep! I sure am!" - I begin to get excited, thinking, could this be it, is Mandy really having little buddy now?!! *She is due on the 22...but really it could be anyday now!*
"Ok good..." ....oh man it's time! You see, Mandy said there was only two people allowed in the delivery room. Nathan and ME! "Because I really have to pee" ...what the?! is this really Nathan. "And we can't get into our complex because there is a billion cop cars, there was a shooting in our cult-e-sac and it's all blocked off"
"What?! Seriously? Ok sure come on over!"

Isnt' that crazy! Freakin' four houses down from Mandy and Nates house. A shooting. So crazy.

Anyways. I was SO CLOSE to getting this writen before "thursday" and SO CLOSE *so I tought* to having another niece or nephew.

Aight, time for bed. Peace and much much love.

OOoh if only you were closer.

I found the cutest...bakery ever!

It is on the way to Mt.Baker. It is ridiculously wonderful with glorious tasting muffins and well quasi good hotchocolate. haha. The hot chocolate bit didn't really fit in there.

Anyways it's this small old school house done all brilliantly. Inside it's tiny, bright and eclectique with three or four tables all cozied together. There is a display of muffins, cookies and random baked goods and a short but very chatty man who runs it. If I lived by it I would go there weekly, if not daily to hang out.

*Sigh* it is wonderful and made me feel jousous. Almost as joyous as the day at Baker made me feel.

Thinking and Thoughts

I just finished reading Dans latest post...I tend to read his before catapulting myself into my own writing process. Perhaps looking for some motivation and inspiration.

Tonight he wrote on the fact that he likes to think...to spend quality time processing and contemplating. This got me thinking...how funny would it be to know what people were thinking all the time!

I'm sure it would be super awkward and disturbing at times...but just think about how hilarious it could be at other times! Oh thinking of this reminded me of that movie "What Women Want" with Mel Gibson. And how there were really funny moments in that, and the joy that it brought him knowing what others were thinking... and then he knew what the woman he was interested in was thinking. Good AND bad.
It could definitely be hurtful to know what people were thinking all the time, and the thing about that is, people change there mind so fast that if you only caught a glimpse of what they were thinking then you may miss the conclusion...results could be catastrophic.

I love the fluidity of thoughts, how your brain synapses can rapidly fire one thought and catapult it into another, and another and another...an endless cycle.

These cycles can be ridiculously amusing and intriguing, and that is why it would be fun to know what others were thinking at random times.

OK enough thoughts.

...funny how fast pictures of me become dated. This was taken early Nov. I no longer have that hair colour or those glasses.

If you google my name this will be the #1 thing found.

Megan Hazelton [Middle School Pastor]

It’s funny to think I’m considered old by some, mid twenties to a middle school youth is ancient, while I’m considered young to others. This is why youth ministry is the place for me; I get to be an adult but act like a youth because it’s my “job”! Acting weird, being ridiculously loud and doing crazy things are not the only reason why I love what I do. I get the opportunity to walk along side and support youth who are starting to discover who they are in Christ. Whether they’ve known Jesus all their lives or have yet to call Him saviour it is an awesome adventure to journey with them!

Some answers to frequently asked questions:

• No, I do not remember my natural hair colour.
• Yes, that is my real laugh.
• I went to Columbia Bible College where I got a BA in Youth Work.
• I Have three brothers, three sister in laws, one sister, one brother in law and eight nieces and nephews!
• My parents live in Fort Langley in the house my siblings and I grew up in.
• I enjoy reading, the theatre, visual arts, long boarding and traveling!
• Sushi
• I love music and have a large, eclectic collection. If you were to look on my iPod for recently played you’d see: One Republic, Adele, Snow Patrol, Kanye West, Jonas Brothers & Relient K.

...God only knows if this will be there come June!!

"My soul followeth hard after thee....

...thy right hand upholdeth me."

While reading the first couple of pages of AW Tozers "The Pursuit of God" I was so interested that at this time, early 1900's, he writes about how we need to chase after God, how people are getting caught up in the programs, and getting so busy and yadda yadda yadda. This is not a new struggle! He talks of how we need to hunger and thirst for the Lord really "follow hard after him". I've read Psalm 63 a ton, it's one of my favorites. A couple of weeks ago I got stuck on verse 8 "My soul clings to you" I just loved that imagery, it's not just a desire but a strong sense of necessity, a longing. Then Towser wrote the KJV "My soul followeth hard after thee..." So beautiful.

I was today of what a beautiful picture this verse is of our relationship with God. We are to pursue God, thirst and hunger for him, to chase after him...yet we're already with him. We are to long for his presence yet are already there. We are in his right hand. We are saved, we are righteous in his sight, not by works but by who he is. He holds on to us as we cling to him. It's like a beautiful oxymoron, we chase yet we stand still. We are saved but our salvation doesn't end with a prayer, it begins. We work out our salvation in fear and trembling as we enter into the throne room, yet we are free to sit.

I was thinking about that image, and how it seems pointless...we're chasing and pursuing but not getting anywhere. I knew this wasn't the case but thats how it sort or reads. And I thought of a treadmill, because you run and run and run, but you don't get anywhere! You're stationary. However you still feel the effects of it, it is still healthy, you work your muscles, you strengthen your heart. . . . I followeth hard after thee, thy right hand upholdeth me.

Reunion with old friends

I'm a dork. The above line refers to the characters of Harry Potter. As you may know *if you read my blog* I was re-reading The Half Blood Prince. I finished it today and started devouring the seventh and final book "The Deathly Hallows".

I really do enjoy these books and have missed them... the characters that is. They make me laugh and yes Cry. They make me think, ponder and question. I know, I know they are fictional characters yadda yadda yadda and some may view I'm being swayed by magic and the occult...to that I say, nay! I understand if you dont want to read it, Pauls words in 1 Corinthians rings clear. However tonight I referenced Harrys plight in life to a friend who is struggling with apathy and a disconcerning situation. For them it was a reference that made it clear, a reference that actually illuminated her journey with the Lord.

I've also just realized that writing your thoughts, voicing your oppinions is a scary, precarious thing. So often your words are misconstrewed, misunderstood and mis-represented...

Communication overload.

Texting. Phone Call. Email. Msn Messenger. Facebook. Facebook Chat. Blogging. . .

My friend wrote a blog about texting, and the fact he doesn't like it. I text him a reply because I believe myself to be witty. Meanwhile I'm also talking the them msn. I could be talking to them on facebook as well, but alas I signed off facebook chat.



Two things that did not disapoint me this week:

Re-reading Potter #6

Lost - "We're not going to Guam are we?"

2 in 1

Last night, I had the grossest sleep I've had in a long time. I think I may have had a fever because I woke up sweating, which only ever happens if I'm sleeping in the Gambia or I have a fever. I woke up several times to go to the bathroom. I woke up several other times just to fuss about and turn over.

Now sundays are my get up and face the world, early day. 6:45 that ridiculous phone plays some ridiculous song to wake me up. So often I take a nap when I get home from church.

Today was one of them.

I went to church, and felt very encouraged by the service and the people and it was all around wonderful just like God. And it was sunny and a day full of hope and beauty. I thought about going for a walk or longboarding...however I was sooo stupid tired. So...end of day one.

I layed down at aprox. 2 and set my alarm for 4. I woke up at 2:30 and had to pee. I woke up at 3 because I got a phone call. I woke up at 4 because my alarm went off. I woke up at 5:05 because I'd fallen back asleep.

Beginning of day two.

I woke up, read some more Potter *re-reading #6* and then headed out for Citywide. This is a city ...wide... worship night for the youth of abbotsford. It's held at CBC, where I graduated from so it was awesome I saw a bunch of guys I graduated with, and then a bunch of my youth showed up. To be honest I was nervous because I'd never been "out" with my youth... haha funny right? but it all went well and I got some sweet opportunities to connect with some I dont know well, and pray with others, it was good. I came home finished watching accepted with Carly, Than and Benny...laughed. And now I'm here.

End of day Two...almost.

Pointless Blog? Sure, but today was a great day. 2 in 1 Sunday was both on great accounts.

An Article

I wrote this for our church "magazine" ...it was 11 at night, and I didn't edit it....

While sitting across from a young girl, who is obviously in love with the Lord and actively pursuing him, a small truth became a big one for me. Parents have the chance to have a huge impact on their children spiritually. I had asked her what she was learning from God, and she had mentioned she was reading a book that her mother had recommended and reading through proverbs with a group of her friends. I thought this was amazing; she was devouring a book her mother suggested and reading proverbs! I asked why her and her friends were reading proverbs turns out it was suggested by her friends’ father. It was initiated by a parent. It wasn’t forced upon her or mandatory but suggested, shared with. It was her choice but initiated by a parent.
I’ve seen it many times, where youth do not take initiative in their relationship with God because although their parents may be Christian they are not actively involved in their faith formation. A relationship is not modeled to them, but merely given face time, it isn’t a way of life but a program that has been downloaded without any thought.
Youth is only two hours out of every week; it would be naive to think that this would be the greatest potential for spiritual formation. Don’t get me wrong I’m not trying to type myself out of a position however I do realize that the home should be the primary teaching ground when it comes to spiritual matters. When a parent engages in conversation with their child about what they are reading in the bible, what they are learning from God and the questions that they have, it provides the youth an opportunity to discuss and formulate their own faith. It helps them discover that they too are capable of having a real relationship with the Father. Lifeline is hopefully a place where youth feel comfortable to come and share, to learn and grow and to be supported by their leaders. Growth, challenge, and equipping takes place at lifeline, but it’s not only coming from a lifeline night, or a over a cup of steamed milk, it’s coming from the home. And that’s a beautiful thing!

The list.

Last month I posted the beginnings of a sort of to do list. This list is not where I put things that are sort of a "dreams" or "possibilities" but things that I truly desire to see come into fruition and if I can I will work towards them. For ex. I did not put "adopt" on their...because all though it is something that I think I may want to do later in life, I have no idea if I marry if that would be the desire of their heart however I put "to be in a musical' because someday I will be!



I will begin to describe why things are on the list. The frist one I had on my list was



SKYDIVE.



...I know right? Sort of cliche? Phh my theory of cliches is that they are overused for a freakin' reason!! I have skydive on my list, not to seem bold or daring. Partially to seem adventurous sure. But really could you imagine free falling from a freakin' airplane! The turbulence of it all, the breath taking *literally* sensation!? Oh man, I could barely imagine. Yes I'd probably be crapping my pants, and someone might literally have to throw me out of the plane but freakin' eh I'll get out there! I'll be strapped onto someone else, i'll have multiple shoots that I wont even be in charge of opening...but I will jump from a plane! Ahhh I'm scared just thinking about it!

Obligation

Sometimes in a commitment you do said thing out of obligation. This is one of those times.

Oscar Wilde. I think this man is ridiculously wonderful and witty. . .

"Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth."

"A man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction."
This one made me chuckle.

"Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future. "

"Who being loved is poor."

"When the gods want to punish us they answer our prayers."

"Women are made to be loved, not understood."

A friend of the families passed away yesteday, she was only in her 40's.
My chest definitely aches.

I may BE old but atleast I don't LOOK old.

While helping my mom pick out glasses a few months back I found frames that I loved and today I went into Iris to check out how much it would be to get a second pair of glasses. Turns out I'm due for an eye exam.

SO I'm chatting with the chick helping me,

"it's $90 for an eye exam right?"

" it's $95 actually, well how old are you?"

" 25."

"Oh, then yeah it's $95....you dont look that old"

"oh, well I get that, heh, I work with youth too soo..."

"Oh yeah... you look younger"

BAH HA, it really looked like she was confused! So there you have it, I may be getting older *no I'm not old* but I don't look it, I sure hope that sticks for the rest of my life! I shall be timeless.

.two quasi seperate thoughts.

.When will I learn I can't be all things to all people.

.Lord, allow me to embrace being a woman in ministry.

Only five more minutes left in sunday the 25th. I've been trying to figure something witty to write. Or commical to share. Or earth shattering deep to spill.

Its not going to happen.

However, I've learned in the past couple of days of another Couple that I know are to be maried this year! I lost count of how many newlyweds/almost weds/newly engaged people I know...it's CRAZY! It'd definitely that stage in life I suppose. And I counted how many weddings I've been to/invited to and it's a RIDICULOUS amount...although I have a large family. I love weddings though I think they're great fun, especially if they have dancing!

I'm really excited for my dear friends who are getting married, such an exciting time!

I think it is so important that people dont look for completion in marriage, that people dont look to their soon to be spouse and expect them to fill every desire, every longing, every part of their soul with love and acceptance. That only comes from the Lord and I think it can be damaging to a relationship to expect all that from them.

Sometimes I look at married couples and think...really? They found someone? Isnt' that horrible!!! How ridiculous is that hey? I almost want to slap myself for thinking it, however I have... and it usually follows with, then why the crap can't I?!



oops i forgot about this.

aight i'm off to bed. hahah my friend is staying on facebook until I go to sleep.

blabber mouth megan

Tonight I'm staying at Corrie and Natasha's ....you may not know them but I think everyone in the world should. They're amazing. ANYWAYS I came to watch LOST...OH MAN DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED......SOOO GOOD! I came early and talked....and talked...and talked. I've had a very full couple days, and haven't seen them since before Christmas.

I tell you this because well, I have a lot to say. I feel at times I'm bursting with thoughts and random things of non importance and other times of great importance!

Some random things:

- If I could go into the LOST world, I'd like to visit with Ben Linus...such an intreguing, manipulative little man. I'd also like to hang out with Charlie...but that's not an option. Then Sawyer & Desmond. Then Hurley...

- I forgot what I was going to write....

oh how the world turns

Dinner to go.

Tonight I had a gr. 8 guy running around slapping people in the face with a hot dog. Yep, he had hot dogs for dinner and thought it would be a great idea to bring a few along. Welcome to my life as a middle school pastor.

I LOVE IT!

A list.

While watching good ol' scrubs, I decided a few things:

1. Spinich dip is amazing, but the spinich tends to get stuck in zee teeth

2. Zach Braff is a very fine looking man.

3. I would start to compile a list of things I want to do during my life. It's going to be long, and one that I continually add to. I've mentally had one for a long time, but I forget some or I've done some and I have no record of it...well obviously memories of the things I have done...ANYWAYS ...man I'm really good at rambling.

Ok so yes.

The list:

- Skydive

- Learn guitar

- Be in a musical

- Longboard in Hawaii

- Go to Greece

- Live in: England *atleast a year* & New York *atleast 6 months*

- Learn Signlanguage

- swim with Dolphins and Sea Turtles

- Learn Japanese or Korean

- Paint a large canvas

- Visit every state

- Own a beagel

- Get married

I MAY steal the format Dan uses and go back to the list and explain why it's on the list and all that jazz...we'll see.

.trend.

It's 2:04 am...*warning this will be long*

I tried to go to bed at 1 after watching a couple episodes of Scrubs seasone one *which I bought myself today as a happy birthday me thing*

I couldnt' sleep, my brain wouldn't turn off. So I prayed.

I read Psalm 51 because I heard God say to read it, aparantly I hadn't spent some time cleansing my heart in a while and you know the heart can be like a semi-clogged drain sometimes...the build up...well just keeps on building up. It was refreshing, I prayed it out loud a couple times intermitted with thoughts and iniquities. Then I ambled to the kitchen and ate some trail mix...my tummy is still rumbly. Now here I sit and it's if the spirit is slowly filling the void that those confessed things left...it's calming, beautiful.

I feel that there is always a part of me that goes untouched by the spirit, like that little bit of slushy that you can never seem to get out. I know the Lord is in me and I'm 100% his...however that sliver of "human nature" clings on. That sliver that festers. I'll only truly be contented and whole when that sliver is forever removed.

Arg, dang tummy, I dont want to eat a ton of crap at 2am but I need something... cereal would be great but I dont have milk neither does my roomy.

Don't judge but I have a bagel toasting while I type.

Today was my birthday. Yep 25. Crazy, I'm in my mid-twenties. I think I like growing up, I'm still discovering who I am and the many diverse sides of myself. However I'm more founded in who I am. I'm stronger, willing to say more of what I need and want to say not just what I should say. There is a boldness that comes with age, I pray it never becomes cockyness. I'm becoming less selfish in acts and thoughts, less protective *not quite the word I was looking for* of my things but not less materialistic. I'm becoming more aware of my singleness *didn't think that could happen* and more aware of the fact that I truly desire to have a husband and one day a family. I'm softening to the idea of him being my leader and protector...although I'm not letting go of the balance and mutual submission. I'm growing up, however at the core of my being is that little girl who is frightened of what the world gives away and what invades her being. The Lord is good though, and His love truly endures forever.

The other day we had Lifegroups *our small groups* for youth. I usually will drive around to the different lifegroup locations and see how things are going, however last tuesday I stayed at one of the gr.8 girl groups. One precious girl asked "Is it ever...wrong to pray....like while you're going to the bathroom...or showering?" She asks as if she was confessing a sin that has been weighing her down for years. I burst out laughing, I quickly reassured her that her question was not invalid and I had thought of that one as well. I perseeded to say she can pray anywhere anytime and that the Lord just doesn't think like we do. It was an honest, totally lagit question. I definatly appriciated that one. I love being a youth pastor.

Honest questions, ones asked with integrity and a true desire to know the answer are a beautiful but unique set of questions.

Hmm I think the bagel did it's job.

Oh, I just read my title "trend" now I wrote that will thinking of how so many people got into blogging near the end of 06 through 07, I know many were on before and have been loyal. But a vast amount of the people who I knew that jumped on the bandwagon...definatly fell off. Some lasting more than others...but no longer on the ride for sure. Trends are interesting things.

Can I just say one thing, probably sound lame and so typical of girls and fasion. But seriously the whole scarf trend makes my heart sad. I've been wearing scarfs for years. Not just the winter scarf scarf but the cotton uber trendy oversized hankerchief ones. Now it doesn't make me sad because they're popular. But it does make me sad that I was wearing them before they got popular and will continue to wear them after they are popular but I will be seen as stuck behind the times because I'm still wearing them! I'm definatly not saying I started this trend because I sure didn't. However I will say this...out of my friends I definatly was wearing them before most if not all. Just putting that out there.

I think I should print off all my blog and put it in "Journal". I may not write as honest as if it were my journal journal...but aleast I can read it *seriously my journal is pretty illegible at times* and I often write more because writing by hand takes more effort and a lot more time. I shall do that one day....

I'm not going to lie, I spend way to much time on facebook and online for sure. I think its highly based on the fact that I, like everyone else, wants to feel connected. Even writing this is a way to stay connected. A way to ensure peole know what I'm thinking and still around. I have a lot of friends *not to sound cocky* but I really do. However it seems that its' spread out like an over sized cookie and has become vast and thin. I spend my time with people in coffee shops or food establishments catching up the month(s) because there hasn't been time to just connect. Hanging out with multiple peole is few and far between these days unless they're my youth staff. I love talking, I love connecting, and listening. It's the heartbeat of who I am. But it's a lot of work, and I'm tired. I need adventure, crazy stunts and just plan ol' hangin' out to refresh my soul. I'm tired of being the care taker. Perhaps this is why I cling to facebook and now this blog...I am tired of playing catch up so this is me grasping at staying in the now.

I feel as though I could go on... and on...

I've enjoyed typing this blog, don't feel bad if you skipped to this part because it's the last sentence. I forgive you. Go ponder something and write it down.

This is the show that has waltzed into my life this past month. It's glorious, bright in colour and wit, quarky, and full of great characters. I strongly recommend it.The premice is The Pie Maker, Ned can touch things and bring the back to life, with a few stipulations such as if he touches this person or thing again it dies ...again, and if he brings this person or thing to life for more than a minute something or someone else must die. He brought his childhood sweatheart (Charlotte or Chuck as Ned admiringly calls her) back to life, and yes someone else died. Now they are in love but can not touch else she will be undead no more but merely dead.

Ned owns "The Pie Hole" a brilliantly named pie place and is also a partner of Emerson who is a private eye, together they wake the dead, solve murders and collect the rewards. Olive works in the pie shop and is irreversibly in love with The Pie Maker. Digby is Neds childhood dog...and yes it was ran over once. Chuck has two aunts with mood disorders whom she can not see because she is suppose to be dead. Yep, a cast full of crazies...it's phenomenal.

Oh in case you couldn't guess, my new celebrity crush is definitely the Pie Maker himself...

Sometimes I love technichalities

...that's probably spelt wrong but I'm too tired to check the lovely dictionary.com. Well it's TECHNICALLY sunday today. 12:45 in the morning, just because I haven't been to sleep yet, or awaken yet in this day, doesn't mean it's not sunday.





Anyways Tomorrow...ahem rather today is going to be a bit of a Chaotic one so I may not get a chance to write, and I dont want to botch my commitment on the second go!





I have to be up in 5 hours. I'm not going to lie, this whole being to work at 7:45 on sunday mornings is a difficult one for me. If you are unaware, I sleep...a lot. I love sleep. I'm a night owl however so that means I enjoy sleeping in. I didnt' actually get out of bed until like 12:30 today BAH HA. it's a tad ridiculous seeing as I'm almost a 25 year old woman however it is what it is.

I have a new show that is topping my charts and also a new celebraty crush...I'll tell you all about it in my next post.