"I love you more than life" this lyric echoed through my chest and mind as hillsong helped me enter into worship...yet this lyric didn't roll of the tongue as it should, didn't slide into place in my heart allowing it to resonate in my soul.
Instead it rattled around.
"I love you more than life" ...could I honestly sing that? And truly mean it. Did my life reflect it? Does my heart cry it?
It almost scared me to think that I couldn't sing that... I mean really sing that.
Then yesterday during the closing session of the youth workers conference I was at. The key note speaker echoed this quesiton. Do you love Jesus? Do you REALLY love Jesus.
I know I "love" Jesus. I always will, my heart belongs to him. But yet this question has depth.
This morning as I prayed with the other pastors, I prayed that we would discover what it means to love Jesus again, that we would kneel in his presence and learn what it meant to love him.
"There is love that came for us.
Humbled to a sinner's cross you broke my shame and sinfuless you rose again victorious. Faithfulness none can deny through the storm and through the fire there is truth that sets me free Jesus Christ who lives in me.
You are stronger you are stronger.
Sin is broken you have saved me it is written Christ is risen Jesus you are Lord of all.
No beginning and no end You're my hope and my defence you came to seek and save the lost you paid it all upon the cross.
So let your name be lifted higherBe lifted higher be lifted higher"
As we repeated the chorus I felt compeled to be on my knees, and before I knew it I was there. In his presence, on my knees...just as I prayed.
I'm learning to love once more...