I may BE old but atleast I don't LOOK old.

While helping my mom pick out glasses a few months back I found frames that I loved and today I went into Iris to check out how much it would be to get a second pair of glasses. Turns out I'm due for an eye exam.

SO I'm chatting with the chick helping me,

"it's $90 for an eye exam right?"

" it's $95 actually, well how old are you?"

" 25."

"Oh, then yeah it's $95....you dont look that old"

"oh, well I get that, heh, I work with youth too soo..."

"Oh yeah... you look younger"

BAH HA, it really looked like she was confused! So there you have it, I may be getting older *no I'm not old* but I don't look it, I sure hope that sticks for the rest of my life! I shall be timeless.

.two quasi seperate thoughts.

.When will I learn I can't be all things to all people.

.Lord, allow me to embrace being a woman in ministry.

Only five more minutes left in sunday the 25th. I've been trying to figure something witty to write. Or commical to share. Or earth shattering deep to spill.

Its not going to happen.

However, I've learned in the past couple of days of another Couple that I know are to be maried this year! I lost count of how many newlyweds/almost weds/newly engaged people I know...it's CRAZY! It'd definitely that stage in life I suppose. And I counted how many weddings I've been to/invited to and it's a RIDICULOUS amount...although I have a large family. I love weddings though I think they're great fun, especially if they have dancing!

I'm really excited for my dear friends who are getting married, such an exciting time!

I think it is so important that people dont look for completion in marriage, that people dont look to their soon to be spouse and expect them to fill every desire, every longing, every part of their soul with love and acceptance. That only comes from the Lord and I think it can be damaging to a relationship to expect all that from them.

Sometimes I look at married couples and think...really? They found someone? Isnt' that horrible!!! How ridiculous is that hey? I almost want to slap myself for thinking it, however I have... and it usually follows with, then why the crap can't I?!



oops i forgot about this.

aight i'm off to bed. hahah my friend is staying on facebook until I go to sleep.

blabber mouth megan

Tonight I'm staying at Corrie and Natasha's ....you may not know them but I think everyone in the world should. They're amazing. ANYWAYS I came to watch LOST...OH MAN DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED......SOOO GOOD! I came early and talked....and talked...and talked. I've had a very full couple days, and haven't seen them since before Christmas.

I tell you this because well, I have a lot to say. I feel at times I'm bursting with thoughts and random things of non importance and other times of great importance!

Some random things:

- If I could go into the LOST world, I'd like to visit with Ben Linus...such an intreguing, manipulative little man. I'd also like to hang out with Charlie...but that's not an option. Then Sawyer & Desmond. Then Hurley...

- I forgot what I was going to write....

oh how the world turns

Dinner to go.

Tonight I had a gr. 8 guy running around slapping people in the face with a hot dog. Yep, he had hot dogs for dinner and thought it would be a great idea to bring a few along. Welcome to my life as a middle school pastor.

I LOVE IT!

A list.

While watching good ol' scrubs, I decided a few things:

1. Spinich dip is amazing, but the spinich tends to get stuck in zee teeth

2. Zach Braff is a very fine looking man.

3. I would start to compile a list of things I want to do during my life. It's going to be long, and one that I continually add to. I've mentally had one for a long time, but I forget some or I've done some and I have no record of it...well obviously memories of the things I have done...ANYWAYS ...man I'm really good at rambling.

Ok so yes.

The list:

- Skydive

- Learn guitar

- Be in a musical

- Longboard in Hawaii

- Go to Greece

- Live in: England *atleast a year* & New York *atleast 6 months*

- Learn Signlanguage

- swim with Dolphins and Sea Turtles

- Learn Japanese or Korean

- Paint a large canvas

- Visit every state

- Own a beagel

- Get married

I MAY steal the format Dan uses and go back to the list and explain why it's on the list and all that jazz...we'll see.

.trend.

It's 2:04 am...*warning this will be long*

I tried to go to bed at 1 after watching a couple episodes of Scrubs seasone one *which I bought myself today as a happy birthday me thing*

I couldnt' sleep, my brain wouldn't turn off. So I prayed.

I read Psalm 51 because I heard God say to read it, aparantly I hadn't spent some time cleansing my heart in a while and you know the heart can be like a semi-clogged drain sometimes...the build up...well just keeps on building up. It was refreshing, I prayed it out loud a couple times intermitted with thoughts and iniquities. Then I ambled to the kitchen and ate some trail mix...my tummy is still rumbly. Now here I sit and it's if the spirit is slowly filling the void that those confessed things left...it's calming, beautiful.

I feel that there is always a part of me that goes untouched by the spirit, like that little bit of slushy that you can never seem to get out. I know the Lord is in me and I'm 100% his...however that sliver of "human nature" clings on. That sliver that festers. I'll only truly be contented and whole when that sliver is forever removed.

Arg, dang tummy, I dont want to eat a ton of crap at 2am but I need something... cereal would be great but I dont have milk neither does my roomy.

Don't judge but I have a bagel toasting while I type.

Today was my birthday. Yep 25. Crazy, I'm in my mid-twenties. I think I like growing up, I'm still discovering who I am and the many diverse sides of myself. However I'm more founded in who I am. I'm stronger, willing to say more of what I need and want to say not just what I should say. There is a boldness that comes with age, I pray it never becomes cockyness. I'm becoming less selfish in acts and thoughts, less protective *not quite the word I was looking for* of my things but not less materialistic. I'm becoming more aware of my singleness *didn't think that could happen* and more aware of the fact that I truly desire to have a husband and one day a family. I'm softening to the idea of him being my leader and protector...although I'm not letting go of the balance and mutual submission. I'm growing up, however at the core of my being is that little girl who is frightened of what the world gives away and what invades her being. The Lord is good though, and His love truly endures forever.

The other day we had Lifegroups *our small groups* for youth. I usually will drive around to the different lifegroup locations and see how things are going, however last tuesday I stayed at one of the gr.8 girl groups. One precious girl asked "Is it ever...wrong to pray....like while you're going to the bathroom...or showering?" She asks as if she was confessing a sin that has been weighing her down for years. I burst out laughing, I quickly reassured her that her question was not invalid and I had thought of that one as well. I perseeded to say she can pray anywhere anytime and that the Lord just doesn't think like we do. It was an honest, totally lagit question. I definatly appriciated that one. I love being a youth pastor.

Honest questions, ones asked with integrity and a true desire to know the answer are a beautiful but unique set of questions.

Hmm I think the bagel did it's job.

Oh, I just read my title "trend" now I wrote that will thinking of how so many people got into blogging near the end of 06 through 07, I know many were on before and have been loyal. But a vast amount of the people who I knew that jumped on the bandwagon...definatly fell off. Some lasting more than others...but no longer on the ride for sure. Trends are interesting things.

Can I just say one thing, probably sound lame and so typical of girls and fasion. But seriously the whole scarf trend makes my heart sad. I've been wearing scarfs for years. Not just the winter scarf scarf but the cotton uber trendy oversized hankerchief ones. Now it doesn't make me sad because they're popular. But it does make me sad that I was wearing them before they got popular and will continue to wear them after they are popular but I will be seen as stuck behind the times because I'm still wearing them! I'm definatly not saying I started this trend because I sure didn't. However I will say this...out of my friends I definatly was wearing them before most if not all. Just putting that out there.

I think I should print off all my blog and put it in "Journal". I may not write as honest as if it were my journal journal...but aleast I can read it *seriously my journal is pretty illegible at times* and I often write more because writing by hand takes more effort and a lot more time. I shall do that one day....

I'm not going to lie, I spend way to much time on facebook and online for sure. I think its highly based on the fact that I, like everyone else, wants to feel connected. Even writing this is a way to stay connected. A way to ensure peole know what I'm thinking and still around. I have a lot of friends *not to sound cocky* but I really do. However it seems that its' spread out like an over sized cookie and has become vast and thin. I spend my time with people in coffee shops or food establishments catching up the month(s) because there hasn't been time to just connect. Hanging out with multiple peole is few and far between these days unless they're my youth staff. I love talking, I love connecting, and listening. It's the heartbeat of who I am. But it's a lot of work, and I'm tired. I need adventure, crazy stunts and just plan ol' hangin' out to refresh my soul. I'm tired of being the care taker. Perhaps this is why I cling to facebook and now this blog...I am tired of playing catch up so this is me grasping at staying in the now.

I feel as though I could go on... and on...

I've enjoyed typing this blog, don't feel bad if you skipped to this part because it's the last sentence. I forgive you. Go ponder something and write it down.

This is the show that has waltzed into my life this past month. It's glorious, bright in colour and wit, quarky, and full of great characters. I strongly recommend it.The premice is The Pie Maker, Ned can touch things and bring the back to life, with a few stipulations such as if he touches this person or thing again it dies ...again, and if he brings this person or thing to life for more than a minute something or someone else must die. He brought his childhood sweatheart (Charlotte or Chuck as Ned admiringly calls her) back to life, and yes someone else died. Now they are in love but can not touch else she will be undead no more but merely dead.

Ned owns "The Pie Hole" a brilliantly named pie place and is also a partner of Emerson who is a private eye, together they wake the dead, solve murders and collect the rewards. Olive works in the pie shop and is irreversibly in love with The Pie Maker. Digby is Neds childhood dog...and yes it was ran over once. Chuck has two aunts with mood disorders whom she can not see because she is suppose to be dead. Yep, a cast full of crazies...it's phenomenal.

Oh in case you couldn't guess, my new celebrity crush is definitely the Pie Maker himself...

Sometimes I love technichalities

...that's probably spelt wrong but I'm too tired to check the lovely dictionary.com. Well it's TECHNICALLY sunday today. 12:45 in the morning, just because I haven't been to sleep yet, or awaken yet in this day, doesn't mean it's not sunday.





Anyways Tomorrow...ahem rather today is going to be a bit of a Chaotic one so I may not get a chance to write, and I dont want to botch my commitment on the second go!





I have to be up in 5 hours. I'm not going to lie, this whole being to work at 7:45 on sunday mornings is a difficult one for me. If you are unaware, I sleep...a lot. I love sleep. I'm a night owl however so that means I enjoy sleeping in. I didnt' actually get out of bed until like 12:30 today BAH HA. it's a tad ridiculous seeing as I'm almost a 25 year old woman however it is what it is.

I have a new show that is topping my charts and also a new celebraty crush...I'll tell you all about it in my next post.

.The Commitment.

I've come to the conclusion that I'm sort of a pushover. Or perhaps I'm just easy going. But if I'm thinking about something, or are undecided, on the edge about something I can be easily swayed.

...I was talking to my friend Dan who made a commitment in 2008 to write on his blog twice a week and has bumped it to three times for 2009. . . and now somehow I've committed to writing twice a week, so you can expect a new post on sundays' and wednesdays' from me. Now I'm sure I will forget every now and again, but I will strive to honor this committment. The only thing is I never said for how long.. hmmm intersting. Although I figure its for a year, that seems like a long time. However I will break my fear of committment and say it's for the year.

so here it is the first wednesday of the committment...and the first post.

and before you know it it's 2009!

And just like that 2 months are gone! Gone I say! Well about ten minutes ago I was feeling ever so ready to post a nice big juicy blog....that was ten minutes ago.

2009 so far...

- I've had my first slush while the snow was falling mmmm slushie
- I've had my first 3.5 hour nap
- I've not watched lost (...that won't last)
- I've wondered if this will be the year for that "special" relationship (cheese mmm I can dig it)
- I've been to the states and said goodbye to a dear friend (they're back overseas)
- I've struggled with my "calling"
- I've struggled with where that calling is
- I've laughed
- I've missed dear friends who are no longer close
- I've written my frist blog