Friday, May 26, 2006

not hurt enough to be numb but getting close

hey guys, i really don't want to sound depressing or be a downer, for all should know that it is one of my least favorite things in the world. the thing is though. i'm just sad. Disneyland was awesome, soo fun and I loved it. a haitis from my real life. I got home monday night and on tuesday had a minor breakdown realizing that I am walking the edge of my chosen path and it sucks. then tonight before work i found out that a guy i went to school with died on sunday. it's just so hard. life is really not an easy thing at times. part of me wants to laugh, have fun and encourage but the other part is so broken, confused and in need of the courage and support.

sue gilmore wrote a card to me before outreach with this in it "cast your cares onto the lord and he will sustain you" psalm 55(?) prayer needs to become who i am once more.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh megs!!! i'm sorry you are having such a hard time but im glad you had a little vacation outside your regular life!
there could be tons of different reasons you are going through this "unpleasant " part of life i think time and God will reveal what you have to know!! I love yah Megs its been awhile since you seen your nephews and niece time to babysit... he he just kidding .... love yah T

Polythene Pam said...

Hey Megan. I love you and I will be praying for you. I don't know what else I can say. That sucks so much. I'm so sorry you have to go through this time. Hopefully when Ally gets back we can give you a call. Love you!

Danny said...

Sista you will be in my prayers. I mean that. I do not know why God allows certain things to happen, but I do know that He is bigger than everything and the more you look at him the bigger he gets. I do not know if that is encouraging at all, but I found it encouraging when someone told me that today.

The Bean Bag Chair said...

Hey beautiful...
Wish I could give you a hug in person right now, and share a cup o' java at Wendels which would make life seem alright for 5 glorious minutes...but I'll do the next best thing and keep prayin' for ya. I love and miss you like CRAZINESS and hope to see you soon...God works in mysterious ways!

shinbone #4 said...

Oh Megan I'm sorry things have been hard for you...
You know what helped me so much during my year of that? Praising God. That song "Blessed Be Your Name" became my anthem... it really did consistently change my attitude and reminded me how much God loves, when I started tp Praise him and think about who he really is... I don't know if you'll see this comment now, this is an old blog - but if you do then I guess it's for a reason.
So - if you want to sing it with me...
"Blessed be your name when I'm found in the desert place, when I walk in the wilderness, Blesses be Your name.....
He gives and he takes away, He gives and he takes away - But still my heart will say, Lord Blessed be Your name"